Children: What Parents Really Think

Hey children, would you like a peek inside your parents’ minds?

Here’s a secret – when your parents say or do something, they are sometimes thinking something else. This is especially true when you hear them say something that is not exactly what you wanted to hear. Let’s take a look at the following example.

Sometimes, it appears that your parents are discouraging you. It gives the feeling that they’re keeping you back from what you feel would be perfect for you. Do you know what they’re usually thinking in their mind – “May be saying something negative now will motivate my little one to go ahead and shine, just to prove me wrong! Next time, when you think your parents are saying something that makes you feel discouraged or annoyed, try to put yourself in their shoes and think what must be going on inside their mind— certainly a desire to stand defeated in front of you, their child!

Parents love to see their children to be far ahead of them. Next time when you hear your parents say something that is about to make you upset, take a deep breath and think about what they must really be thinking! Your frustration will dissolve in seconds and you will see your parents in a totally new light.

Read Full Post »

It’s a Wonderful Life!

How often do your kids see you having fun? If you are fond of singing loudly when you take a shower, do your children hear you doing that? If you like to shout out with pleasure when your favourite team scores in the match, does your family hear you do it? If you love cracking jokes, do you do it with your kids frequently or have you just saved that talent for guests and parties?

Have you ever thought that life will pass by us and we will keep trying to gather things – some meaningful, others not; or we will keep preaching – some things that we ourselves practise, others which we don’t; or we will keep working endlessly – sometimes towards a purposeful goal and at other times just aimlessly? In all of this, we forget the most important thing of our wonderful life. The journey!

We need to enjoy every moment of life. After growing up, we don’t have to stop having fun. The most important thing we can teach our kids is to live life joyously. We also need to model this. Words are hollow if there is nothing to prove them. So in this new year, let’s resolve to enjoy every moment, thereby giving our children a chance to see that life is wonderful if we approach it with the right attitude.

Read Full Post »

Accept Them As They Are!

Henry Miller once said, “The world is not to be put in order, the world is order incarnate. It is for us to put ourselves in unison with this order.” These words teach us acceptance. Despite whatever shortcomings we see in things around us, we should learn to accept them, including our children.

 To accept your child does not mean that you go straight into their room and tell them that you like them, love them and accept them. Acceptance is reflected in your reaction when your child comes to you with his result card and his marks are not up to your expectation. Do you encourage him at that very moment? If yes, it means you accept him. When he comes with the news that he lost the match or he could not win a prize in the declamation contest, do you listen to him patiently? If you maintain your calm on hearing this, it means you accept him.

 I know many parents who always condemn their wards for one reason or the other. They are always telling their children that they are not doing well. They want to accept their child on their own terms. This can start to cause a lot of problems for the present as well as for the future.

 It is advisable to start accepting and befriending your children at an early stage. Praise them from the core of our hearts and give full credit to all of their strengths and weaknesses. This way, we will naturally come closer to them and our kids would have found in us the best person for friendship.

 My suggestion to parents and also to teachers is to stop finding faults in children all the time. We should rather encourage them at every opportunity and explore what is good in them. They should feel that their elders are their backbone. We should act in such a way that our children do not develop a sense of fear in our presence. They should rather feel safe and secure in our hands.

 Have you ever had the courage to know what kind of parents your kids wanted? What if you were told that you are not up to their expectations! What will happen to you? You will be heartbroken. So, place yourself in their situation. You will soon learn how to deal with them. It will help you in accepting your children just the way they are and thus pave the way for a closer relationship!

 – B. K. Shori

Read Full Post »

Nourishing the Personality

Children need the company of people who will
help to bring out the best in them. The way to do
this is not through criticism. In fact, more than
critics, children need role models. They need to see
a ‘friend’ in their parents, guardians and teachers.

Children can be moulded into anything at a
tender age. The environment around them needs
to be conducive to nourish their personality and
foster their overall development. Physical, mental
and spiritual – all aspects need to be focused on.
Most importantly, a balance needs to be
maintained.

To ensure closeness and healthy relationships,
we do not have to make our children dependent
on us. Instead, we have to provide opportunities
for them to get their wings and help them fly to
reach the stars!

Read Full Post »

Children’s Turn to Understand their Parents!

Parents leave no stone unturned to see their children
happy and successful. Sometimes, children are unable
to understand the love. It is important to show to our
children how each action of parents is a mark of care
and affection.

– What parents and teachers are most worried about is the safety
of their children. Whether at home or at school, in the
playground or in the TV room, they want to protect you from
any type of risks, from all sorts of dangers. So when they ask
you about what you’re doing on the Internet or tell you not to
play with a particular person, don’t feel like they don’t want
to let you have fun. They are only being protective.

– If there’s a problem at school or somewhere outside of home,
don’t feel afraid to share it with your parents. If you think they
will scold you and get angry at you, it is only because they
care. No one will care more about your problem than your
parents. So, talk to them without hesitation. Your parents are
your saviours— they and they alone; none else is. Confide in
them in all cases, in all circumstances. 

– We all need friends and make friends. But sometimes we find
that a friend who appeared to be great at first did not turn out
to be so great in the end. So before making friends, think
twice.

• Someone who would tempt you to lie, to cheat or steal
  is not a friend. Someone who poses to be a better benefactor
  than your parents is not a friend. None can be a greater
  benefactor than the parents.
• Someone who makes a show of his love is not a friend.
  Love is not an exhibition. It is an innate feeling. True friends
  will give you their honest opinion and will be there when you
  need them the most.

– No matter how old you get, don’t ever think that you can
stop hugging your parents. I know we sometimes feel shy
because parents are strict and don’t express their emotions
freely. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t take the first step.
Greet your parents with open arms sometimes. Share your
feelings of care, concern and love openly!

Read Full Post »

Little Things, Big Moments

It is said that “Life is what happens to you when you are
busy making other plans”. We get carried away in things that we
consider are important.We forget that little things of our life usually
are the big moments of our life. They bring us more joy than big
plans we busily go on making.

Here’s a poem that describes how a mother feels when she
happens to notice the little things that her child did and begins to
feel how important it was :

Hand Prints on the Wall

One day as I was picking
the toys up off the floor,
I noticed a small hand print
on the wall beside the door.

I knew that it was something
that I’d seen, most every day,
but this time when I saw it there
I wanted it to stay.

Then tears welled up inside my eyes,
I knew it wouldn’t last
for every mother knows
her children grow up way too fast.

Just then I put my chores aside
and held my children tight.
I sang to them sweet lullabies
and rocked into the night.

Sometimes we take for granted,
all those things that seem so small.
Like one of God’s great treasures—
A small hand print on the wall.

Read Full Post »

Intelligence is Universal

One of the most important goals of education is to enable
students to construct the knowledge they receive at school and at
home. By construction , we refer to the understanding,
communication and application of the acquired knowledge.

In order to meet these goals, children should be given a variety
of options to demonstrate their learning in ways that best suit them.
Some students might be great artists, while others may be excellent
linguists. Some might view a piece of information mathematically,
while others might perceive it artistically— in the perspective of
their own experiences.

Human intelligence has been classified into the following nine types :

1. Logistic/Mathematical Intelligence : Ability to quantify, calculate,
analyze and interpet, use sequential reasoning skills, symbolic
thought and inductive and deductive thinking patterns.

2. Linguistic Intelligence : Ability to think in words, use language
to express and appreciate complex meanings.

3. Naturalist Intelligence : Sensitivity to the features of the natural
world, ability to apply knowledge of the forms of the nature in
day to day life.

4. Musical Intelligence : Ability to identify rhythm, tone and other
musical elements and to connect music to knowledge and
emotions.

5. Existential Intelligence : Capacity to tackle deeper questions
about existence, purpose of life, humanity etc.

6. Interpersonal Intelligence : Effectively use verbal and non-verbal
communication to interact while being mindful of moods and
feelings of others.

7. Bodily/Kinesthetic Intelligence: Capacity to use a variety of
physical skills, manipulate objects, demonstrate good sense of
timing and mind-body-unison.

8. Intra-personal Intelligence: Ability to understand one’s self,
strengths, weaknesses, thoughts and feelings.

9. Spatial/Visual Intelligence: Involves exceptional graphic and
artistic skills, active imagination, mental imagery and ability to
think in three dimensions.

These nine types of intelligence were defined by the legendary
neuropsychologist Howard Gardner are now the basis for guiding
educational practice.

Considering the unique way each individual thinks, processes
and applies information, it is not a surprise that we all differ in the
way we perceive, think and perform. No one— whether a kid or
a grown up— should be expected to do things like others.

Cross-curricular connections have to be emphasized. Language
should thus focus on kinesthetic and musical expression as well
besides the obvious linguistic methods. Similarly, Mathematics should
also focus on expression of Visual and Intrapersonal Intelligence
apart from Logical and Mathematical ability.

Relying on every child’s strengths and giving them means of
using those strengths to perform well in today’s competitive world
is the least we can do. In fact, every child born in this world
deserves a right to be given an opportunity to express himself in
his own way and that is the best way for his harmonious growth.

—Nivedita Shori

(A technology teacher in Canada, she tries to ensure that education and
assessment is suited to the diverse needs of all students.)

Read Full Post »