— A Young Mother’s Reflections
The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.
— Rajneesh
A child is carried in the mother’s womb for nine months before being blessed with the light of the world. As the mother nurtures her baby for this long period of time, the child becomes a ‘part of her’. In the process, the mother develops emotionally, spiritually and mentally.
While a common understanding is that a child is developing biologically inside the womb, it cannot be denied that it is also receiving subconscious impressions of character and spirituality based on the mother’s thoughts, behaviour and personality. Mothers’ influence on the child starts from the moment of conception and it does not end with the birth of her baby. In fact, now the child is ready to explore his parents through his senses as opposed to the subtle ‘sensing’ in the womb. The outlook the child will eventually form towards life depends a lot on the parents. Even among the parents, the mother’s role is a major one.
When I became a mother about two years ago, I did not realize motherhood. But as time passed, I started becoming aware of my role in my little daughter’s life. My parents took care of her for over a year while I was busy in business that demanded my full attention. However, whenever I met her, I felt that to my daughter, her mother was the most perfect creature on earth and the loveliest one. When I met her even after short intervals, she always looked longingly at me. Whenever the interval was a little longer, she tried to stick to me. With each passing day, week and month— I now realize— she always turned to me expecting the role of a caregiver, protector, savior, friend, teacher and companion. At that time, when she was not even two years old, it was amusing to sense these expectations. But now I somewhat understand the void she was passing through.
Now I fully realize that a mother needs to be constantly aware of her role in the child’s life, the role of a loving mother. It may not be easy to be an ideal mother. But love makes every thing possible. Moreover, there are no hard and fast, clearly defined rules that one could follow for motherhood. This could make things harder, especially in the beginning. But with a little bit of understanding, and a combination of openness, patience and flexibility, it is possible.
A mother’s life is now to be lived, not just as another human, but as a positive role model for the child.
In trying to think of how to do a good job as a mother, I found that a very important ingredient is to be willing to change and to constantly try to modify oneself for the better. One cannot be a good mother if one is not ready to adapt to changing circumstances. This is a quality that can help all individuals, but especially a woman who needs to transform herself into a good mother. By being open to change, a mother opens up possibilities for her child to become a well-groomed individual.
Such openness should be reflected in everything a mother does – whether it is her housekeeping habits, day-to-day behaviour, relationship with others and even in taking personal decisions. In all these activities, she should be ready and brave enough to make changes. If she is rigid or unwilling to change her original style, then not only will she make her own life hard, but also make her child’s life miserable.
Some changes might be very hard to carry out— like changing one’s temperament, but the very instinct of motherhood makes things easier. The difficulty is that under the rapidly changing family circumstances and values, the instinct of motherhood is gradually diminishing. Yet, it cannot be denied that it is very important for the child’s positive growth. It is the responsibility of a mother to carry it out. She has to be mindful that all her activities are being observed by the child and will undoubtedly affect the day-to-day behaviour, personality and character of the developing individual.
Being open also means being ready to take responsibility for any wrong action that a mother might have knowingly or unknowingly done. If she does not admit her faults, then her child sees her as hard and unwelcoming. Children have the instinct of sensing this ‘hardness’ and often adopt the same characteristic in their own personality as well. Conversely, if their mother openly admits her mistakes and apologizes when wrong, they feel this ‘softness’ and imbibe that quality.
Lastly, I think that ‘motherhood’ is a full-time job. It can be done well and with enthusiasm if a mother embraces opportunities to make it fun. Dancing, laughing and consciously enjoying with your child are ways to make this role more pleasant. When a mother opens up her arms to hug her child, she opens herself up to a world of possibilities and a world of change. Dressed as a mother, she actually serves various roles in the life of her child. So, it is very important for her to accept motherhood with extraordinary openness.
— Sudeepti Dhawan
Sometimes, the easiest things become the hardest. For our children, we often keep looking for material things they will enjoy, or things they will look good in, or things that their friends have and they would like to have as well.
To bring up a child the way he should go, travel that way yourself once in a while.
Science, Mathematics and History are important for kids to learn, but as parents, one of our primary responsibilities is to focus on children’s social skills as well. 
Miles To Go ... 
